Monday Morning Quarterback

So, I'm assuming that after reading that title, that most of you will be expecting some in depth analysis of all the football action over the weekend...

Well, you're wrong.

I watched one quarter of football this weekend, only one quarter. I thoroughly enjoyed that quarter though, as I got to see the Detroit Lions finish their comeback against the Dallas Cowboys.

Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, with me working midnights, I don't get much of a chance to watch anything that takes place before 4pm. See, I like to sleep in the morning when I get home from work, then wake up in time for my kids to get off the school bus and my wife to get home from work. I found years ago, that even when I have a day off, I feel a lot better if I stick to the same schedule. Sure, I might end up missing some weekend activities that take place in the mornings or early afternoons, but the schedule seems to work well otherwise.

The nice thing about keeping this schedule is that when I do have a day off (night off) after everyone goes to bed I have the entire night to myself. This is "Mikey" time. It's the time when I play video games, watch tv, and basically do whatever the fuck I want.

Recently, I've taken an interest in re-living my youth by playing retro video games. I remember fondly when I received my first NES for my birthday, and spent the entire day playing Super Mario Brothers, Metroid, and Zelda. I explored every inch in those games I could find, several times over. I scoured Nintendo Power mags for cheats and secrets. I quizzed my friends for tips and tricks that would make the games easier. When I finished a game, I'd let a buddy borrow it in exchange for one of his games.

Those were great times...

So, in an effort to relive my youth one more time, I decided to dust off the old NES and replay one of my favorite games of all time... Bionic Commando.

Now, before I go any further, let me explain one thing. I'm an average gamer. I'm good at some games, and bad at others. Within my circle of friends and family, I've had access to just about every possible gaming system that's come out since the first Atari. I say this to you so you'll gain some kind of an understanding of my playing ability and knowledge before I continue on. For example, I recently finished Gears of War 3 on the Xbox. I had a blast running, jumping over half walls, killing tons of Locust and Lambent, reviving my team mates, and basically tearing thru the game on Normal difficulty without much of a problem. Being able to do all of those things, practically at the same time, and make it thru the game with relative ease is typical of my playing experience these days. With the new games being fairly easy, the old games should be a piece of cake right?

Boy, was I wrong.

I died about 4 times in the first 4 minutes of Bionic Commando. I got so upset after about 10 minutes that I had to take a break. I mean, come on, where's the FUCKING JUMP BUTTON?!? I couldn't get the bionic arm to work right, I kept getting knocked off platforms, and once I even swung myself right into a small body of water and died. I was frustrated.

After a little cool down break, I went back to playing. I started getting the controls down, and things started going right. I was on my way to saving Super Joe again, just like I did when I was a kid.

I have to admit that I'm having fun. There are parts of this game I've completely forgotten about, and it's entertaining to see them again. I'll do a complete "retro review" at a later date and fill you all in on the experience. For now though, Super Joe needs me!